Wednesday, March 3, 2021

#62 Friends that tell me the truth

People who tell the truth are the best, even though I sometimes get my feelings hurt when I don't love what they say. My new friend Melanie, for example, always tells me the truth (I call her the Jewish mother I never had!) so I have learned to not ask her if I can't handle the response I might get. :)

When I'm really down I also need to hear the truth.

The last few days were a mental health wasteland for me. Now that I am out of it, I can't believe how far down I was.

I did have the wherewithal to call a dear friend that I absolutely trust with anything. We were only on the phone for about 6 minutes and I was crying in the midst of the pain and pity I was feeling for myself. She listened long enough [read: not as long as I wanted to go on and on] then suggested I make a gratitude list and explain to myself why I was grateful for those things. I heard her loud and clear: I was circling the drain and needed to get my mind into a better state. My feelings were stung a little and I felt embarrassed. 

Later I did make that list. I still haven't written why (I wrote it at midnight! I was tired!) but just thinking about the "why" helped me change my attitude.

Feeling a little embarrassment and humiliation is a small price to pay for being vulnerable enough to reach out for help. Though I don't always feel good when I "tell on myself", I always feel better later.

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